They say to be happy!

 Copyright © WD, 2021 All rights reserved.

We live in a pretentious world, a world where fancy words are meant to deceive minds and find its way into creating the illusion of what one's mind would have wanted. Losing on the needs of the very own existence of that being. Having said something so complex with big words is just an example of how our world works.

It starts early when we all are made to dream about newest toys in the market, a visit to Disneyland, when we watch the fairytales and see those magical creatures. Then a little after that when we are told about the halls of Harvard, Oxford or Massachusetts. Then they say to get a job like everyone else and strive for that, give proof of your hard work three times a week and still stay there burning under the questioning gaze of people since giving out results were not possible for you.

Having a job in this time of societal turmoil, wars, pandemics is a chance not all get, but not being able to justify the chance given to you is even more hurtful isn't it? Or is it just unnatural for the world to grow in an exponential manner, giving exponential pressure on the people who are in some way driving the growth for the rich people sitting way above us?

Well for several reasons I believe it is always 30 percent chance and 70 percent what we have done. But sometimes the sides switch and it can become 70 percent on chance matters. The understanding of this calculation is even more complex and burdensome, but the point is straight "Are we allowed to make choices?"

Answers to this might vary from person to person, for I am a person from the middle class where I have shared a motorbike with my father and my pregnant mother on a rainy night, I still remember the fear my five year self had. I decided to have a car as soon as I grow old so that we don't have to commute that way. But later I understood having a motorbike was a rich sign, otherwise people have to stuff themselves in the buses, and walk back distances to get to bus stops. I don't clearly remember if I shared my fear, but the way I hugged and slept my mother that night my father must have sensed. He brought a second hand car. Our first car.

So for me I never really had choices unless I had power to make them for myself. I have always wanted to earn a lot of money, and I saw so many students getting money from scholarships so I decided to get as much prize money and scholarships as I could. Not because my parents couldn't provide but because I wanted to start early. I tried so many different things, each one of them different from the others. Writing was no exception. The most I could get from all these "hobbies" of mine were some trophies. And every time I brought them home my parents' eyes glimmered. I knew I was doing something good. They say money can't buy you happiness, but it definitely buys you peace to sleep well in an insulated house and comfy bed that even if tomorrow, you encounter an unexpected situation you have money to back yourself, eat well and buy stuff you want not just a mere minimum of need fulfillment.

I might be a sinner to compare money with happiness but I don't think I have known any other way to find happiness. I have seen my father overwork himself so that he can get what his family needed, that made him happy. I have seen my mother save as much as she could so that when we want something urgently money doesn't become a barrier and that has always given a victory smile on her face. I have seen my family content when I treated them with a full course dinner from my 1st salary. That was happiness and they were all directly proportional to money.

So many children must have spent their childhoods in this course of exploration of means to become rich and famous when you. "Start early", they say. Only to understand later that all remains mere hobbies and don't pay our bills. So many painters are better than me, I don't stand a chance even if I stand strong. So many writers there struggled to publish a good book, no one to read. Musicians singing masterpieces in the subways. Actors performing their last shows in a downtown theater with a handful of audience members, regretting their wish to live the life they wanted because it was not fulfilling. 

And then there are people who are considered to be lucky enough to land a job, but they dream of something else, a dream which seems too unreal to be true. Burdened under the realities of the world we live in, reconsidering the choices because losing a chance might mean losing the only opportunity that was in the store. So many what if's and what nots. Planning the uncertainty of the future with certainty in mind. Losing sleep when it was once the most easily available thing. Sinking hearts as the clock ticks on weekends and fearing Mondays. This whole circle is so tiring and fearful. 

What if I am not able to have enough to provide for the medical emergencies remains my personal number one concern in this life. Someone told me that a soul gets human life to live, love, laugh, enjoy and be happy. 

But I  often question, do we really live in this pressing world?

Do people really love, or is it just duties to some and lust for others?

Do we really laugh out of internal happiness? 

Do we enjoy what we do, or do we do it just because what we enjoy doesn't pay enough? 

Are we really happy in this human life that we have made?

Imagine if we could allow the liberty of choice to every new human life to choose whatever they like to do, barring the factors of class, money, race, resources, results or any other such human made markers. What a world it would be, passionate businessmen and businesswomen, not because they inherited it but because they deserved it. Doctors who would love patients more than the money they could provide. Scientists who loved space or cells and viruses not just with genius IQ levels but with wild ideas and power to bring them to reality. Cyclists, swimmers, players, painters who could paint the colors no one ever recognized, writers with stories from the remotest parts of the universe inside their heads, actors who actually knew acting and not just had a "model" like body and unnatural beauty standards. 

With all in it, it would have been a world to live a happy life in. But sorry to break it to you, the imagination part ends here. And since we came back to reality and I don't have money to build a gold castle nor I have talents to fetch me my dreams and neither I have the boldness, confidence and courage to stand tall as a rebel like Freddie Mercury, all I have to give to you is the thoughts of the world we still can create. Not one but all of us because generations down the lane we might get to experience what we do today, in another human life in another body with the same soul just years apart. And some strength as well as power to stand up and fight for the life we are living now and dreaming for tomorrow.